seraph/serif
I name myself and for a moment I pretend I can be small and ethereal
I name myself again and for a moment I can ground myself in the sharp snick of a K across my
teeth
I wish my name was pressed to your lips and that you were the one tearing it apart but you
aren’t
So I back up, reevaluate, I flip it around so it’s still spiteful
I add Carcinogen, I add Bubonic Plague, I add Centipede and Sadism
And I turn it into a soup of nicknames that can roll out of your mouth
And I can’t stop staring at your mouth because it doesn’t form my name as violently as I want it to
I shake it up, remove the hatred, remove the cursing
I add soft sounds, cradle Ss and Es
I hold it gently, like an animal that won’t bite me
I sit with it
And I sit with it
I name myself again and add God
I name myself Angel because I want to be holy
Artist Statement
seraph/serif is partially a kind of love letter and partially an exploration of my history with naming myself.
Zak Struck
I am a sophomore at Bennington College and I'm studying literature and SCT. I've always been really interested in the ways people talk about their gender and a lot of my poetry excavates my own experiences with transness.